Happy Veterans Day to all my fellow veterans! Your nation and I thank you for having the selflessness and courage to put civilian life on hold to become part of the “less than 1%” of Americans that serve in the military.

There is a handful of war movies and drama series I like to watch every now and then. Two of my favorites are “Apocalypse Now” and “The Deer Hunter.” A few others include “We Were Soldiers,” “Blackhawk Down,” “Platoon,” and the “Band of Brothers” series.

One interesting aspect of war movies is if and how the writers depict “saying good-bye” to friends and family before deploying off to war. “Apocalypse Now” just starts with Martin Sheen’s character already in Vietnam. There are no heartbreaking moments of kissing the wife and children and wondering if they will ever see each other again. That way of going about it works well in many movies and shows.

I love the goodbye scenes in “The Deer Hunter.” Of the group of steelworker friends in Pennsylvania, Nick, Steven, and Michael are leaving for Vietnam. Steven gets married just before leaving for the Army. They have a big Orthodox wedding and a reception at the local VFW-like hall. It’s actually the historical Lemko Hall in Ohio.

There is a short scene at the reception where they meet a Green Beret home from Nam in the hall’s bar area. The group files in and Steven points and shouts, “A Green Beret!”

The soldier gives them a death stare in return. They ask him “what’s it like.” The Green Beret replies, “F it.” Only he used the actual word. No advice for the soon-to-be soldiers, I guess. No combat vet war stories to share from “the ‘Nam.” As Steven leaves for his wedding night, the others do a final hunting trip. At that point, the movie shifts to combat scenes in Nam.

The goodbye scene from “We Were Soldiers” is quite different. Lieutenant Colonel Hal Moore kisses his sleeping wife goodbye and walks off in the night to link up with his departing battalion headed to Vietnam. He gave a profound speech to his men the day before.

“I can’t promise you that I will bring you all home alive. But this I swear, before you and before Almighty God, that when we go into battle, I will be the first to set foot on the field, and I will be the last to step off, and I will leave no one behind. Dead or alive, we will all come home together. So help me, God.”

It’s a powerful scene and it’s no wonder that LTC Moore eventually became Lieutenant General Moore. Ft Benning was also renamed Ft Moore in his honor a few years ago.

My favorite good-bye scene though, is not actually from a war movie. It’s from the comedy “The Hollywood Knights.” It’s set on Halloween night in 1965. The Knights are a car club that play pranks and generally have fun throughout the movie. A subplot is Knights member Jimmy Shine leaving for the Army, and then Vietnam, the next day.

There’s a scene where Jimmy is talking to the much older friend and legacy Knight, Smitty. Smitty shares an Army story about him and his buddy once putting a hot rod engine in a jeep and “hot rodding” around in it.

You could tell Jimmy was scared about his upcoming service. A few friends from the car club gather in the garage with Jimmy to have some beers before he leaves. The club members unveil a secret project they’ve been working on. It’s a beautifully restored car that they then give to Jimmy as a going-away gift. Smitty reminds Jimmy not to do any hot rodding in a jeep out there.

This was an emotional scene for moviegoers. Later in the movie, Jimmy gives one of the new Knights members his Knights jacket to watch over while he’s away. You can’t help but feel that Jimmy might not come back. He does though because he’s in the movie sequel.  

My own goodbye scenes were not filled with profound speeches to my soldiers or lasting memories with friends or that “one more hunting trip.” Before going to Iraq in 2005, my wife and I had a professional photographer take our photo.

We wanted one last photo in case I didn’t return or if I came back badly disfigured. It’s still my favorite photo of us. Family members were gathered at the battalion to say goodbye to the soldiers. I was a Major in command of a company at the time.

The mother of one of my young soldiers confided to my wife that she was so nervous about her son going off to war. My wife reassured her by telling her that I had done this before and would make sure her son was safe.

He did a great job in Iraq and came home safely. The short time I had with my soldiers at this final goodbye event,

I spent with them looking at video clips of Apache gunships killing Iraqi insurgents with Hellfire missiles and clips of Iraqi insurgents mishandling a rocket-propelled grenade and an explosive device, blowing themselves up.

Those latter two clips were taken by insurgents hoping to use them as propaganda. They eventually found themselves in the hands of the Army and then viral via the internet to soldiers pretty much everywhere. I’m sure they are on YouTube now.

As a brigade commander years later, I said my goodbyes to my units leaving for the war zone in the Horn of Africa by visiting them at their units. I hung out with the soldiers and chatted with them.

I watched them load duffle bags and rucksacks into trucks. I told them they’d do great down range. I think the most profound words I said were “Stay out of trouble!” Also, “look out for each other and take care of each other.”

All veterans have their own good-bye memories before they left for basic training for the first time. No doubt that combat veterans have their own goodbye stories before deploying to war zones.

For some, it was a last goodbye.

7. Me and Mary just before I left for Iraq in 2005.

1. From The Deer Hunter, a Green Beret in a bar home from Vietnam. 

2. Also from The Deer Hunter, the guys ask what the war is like

3. We Were Soldiers scene where LTC Hal Moore

speaks to his battalion before deploying. 

4. Mel Gibson as LTC Moore in We Were Soldiers.

5. From Hollywood Knights, Jimmy’s expression when he is told the car is his.

6. Jimmy sitting in his new car, listening to the song California Dreaming, the day before he ships out.

8. A video clip of a Hellfire missile hitting insurgents in Iraq, probably 2004.